How to Speak Like a Leader (So People Actually Listen to You)

I did a small podcast about this recently, but let’s be honest—you probably won’t sit down and listen to it because attention spans are shorter than a minor-league contract. So here’s the short version:

If you sound like an unsure, rambling mess when you speak, nobody’s going to take you seriously.

Doesn’t matter if you’re running a business, coaching a baseball team, or trying to get a group of investors to cut a check. If you can’t deliver your message with confidence, you’re just background noise.

The good news? This is fixable. You don’t have to be the next JFK, but you do need to stop making basic, rookie-ass mistakes that instantly make you sound like the guy in the dugout who talks too much but never actually says anything.

Here’s what you need to do.

1. Stop Sounding Like a Human Question Mark

Some of you talk like every sentence is up for debate.
“We should probably consider increasing our sales goals?”
“I think we need to change our approach at the plate?”
“Maybe we should focus on better customer retention?”

Are you asking me or are you telling me? Because if you’re not sure, why the fuck should I be?

This isn't just about confidence—it's cognitive behavior 101. When your voice goes up at the end of a statement, your brain frames it as uncertain. That uncertainty leaks into how people perceive you. Your tone tells their subconscious "This guy doesn’t believe what he’s saying, so why should I?"

Lose the question mark.
“We’re increasing sales goals.”
“We need a better approach at the plate.”
Say it like you believe it.

2. Take Your Damn Time

You ever watch a great baseball manager in a press conference? They’re never in a rush. They pause. They think. They let their words breathe.

What do most amateurs do? Panic and start talking like a kid who’s had too much Red Bull.

Talking fast doesn’t make you sound smart. It makes you sound nervous.

You need to pause. Breathe. Let people actually absorb what you’re saying before you throw more words at them like a busted pitching machine.

Your brain processes information in chunks. When you rush, you overwhelm your audience's ability to keep up, and they stop listening. Slow it down, and you allow them to actually hear, process, and absorb what you’re saying.

Silence is power. Use it.

3. Get to the Fucking Point (And Know When to Shut Up)

A baseball team meeting should be short and clear. A business presentation should be tight.

If you’re the guy who takes 45 minutes to explain something that should take 5, congratulations—you’ve just lost your audience. Nobody’s listening anymore.

Trim the fat.
Say what you need to say.
Then shut up.

This goes double for youth sports post-game talks.

Look, I get it—you want to teach. You want to make sure your team learns something from the game. But you know what? 100 percent unnecessary.

  • Lost? Everyone’s pissed. Everyone knows what they did wrong.

  • Won? Everyone knows what they did right—and wrong.

You think a 12-year-old shortstop who just spent six hours in the sun is locked in for your 10-minute speech about competing and effort? No. He’s thinking about food and Fortnite.

If you need to say something, pat them on the back and save it for the next practice.

The best speakers? They know when NOT to talk.

Ever been around someone who commands a room with just a look? The kind of leader who doesn’t need to fill every second with words because when they finally speak, people actually listen?

That’s the guy you want to be.

4. Watch Your Fucking Feet—Because Everyone Else Is

Your body language speaks before you do.

Your feet point where your brain wants to go.

Ever see a player in the dugout with his feet pointed toward the clubhouse? Then the knees follow. He’s mentally checked out. Ever sit in a meeting and notice someone’s feet aimed at the exit? Their brain has already left the building.

If you’re leading a meeting, if you’re giving a speech, if you’re coaching a team— you plant your feet, you face your audience, and you own the space.

People judge leadership in milliseconds. Their subconscious picks up on weak, unsure posture before their conscious brain even registers a word you said.

  • Slouched shoulders? You don’t believe in yourself.

  • Crossed arms? You’re defensive or closed off.

  • Avoiding eye contact? You don’t trust what you’re saying.

People will trust your body before they trust your words. So act like you belong there.

5. Your Hands Are Either Helping You or Hurting You

As the great Ricky Bobby once said

'I don't know what to do with my hands.'

Your hands can do two things:

  1. Make you look like a leader.

  2. Make you look like an anxious mess.

If you don’t know what to do with your hands when you talk, here’s a simple rule: Keep them open, keep them controlled.

  • Open palms? That’s trust. It signals honesty and confidence.

  • Pointing? Careful. If you overuse it, you’ll come off aggressive.

  • Excessive movement? You look like you’re flagging down a cab.

  • Hands in your pockets? You look nervous.

If you’ve ever watched a TED Talk, notice how the best speakers use their hands deliberately. Not flailing around. Not stiff. Controlled, purposeful gestures.

Your hands should match your words. If they don’t, you just look like a guy throwing signals at third base with nobody on.

6. If You Need Your Phone, Say So. If Not, Put It Away.

Nothing kills a speaker’s authority faster than glancing at their phone every 10 seconds. Or worse, checking their smartwatch like they’re waiting for a trade deadline update.

People follow presence. You can’t lead a meeting if your attention is half in the room and half in your notifications.

If you need your phone—maybe for notes, analytics, numbers—tell people.

"I’ve got my notes here, so if I’m looking down, that’s why."
"Let me pull up the data real quick."

Now nobody thinks you’re texting your wife about what’s for dinner.

7. Record Yourself—Yeah, It’ll Suck, But Do It Anyway

I used to mic myself up when I coached. And then, like a lunatic, I’d sit there and listen back.

You know what I heard?

  • Every sniffle.

  • Every throat clear.

  • Every useless filler word I didn’t even realize I was saying.

Painful? Yes.
Helpful? More than anything.

If you can’t stand listening to yourself, why the hell should anyone else?

8. Make Eye Contact, But Don’t Stare Like a Psycho

Eye contact is a huge trust indicator. If you don’t look people in the eye, they assume:

  • You’re lying.

  • You don’t believe what you’re saying.

  • You lack confidence.

That’s why guys who get interviewed after a big loss look down. They don’t want to own their words. That’s why great speakers connect with their audience.

But here’s the catch—too much eye contact is weird as hell. If you’re locked onto someone like you’re trying to steal their soul, it’s unsettling.

The trick? Break it up. Look at different people. Hold eye contact, then move to another person. Make it natural.

9. Don’t Overexplain—Say It Once and Move On

Ever have a boss or a coach tell you the same thing three different ways in the same breath?

“Alright guys, we gotta execute better. We gotta focus, we gotta clean up our game, and really, at the end of the day, we just have to execute and play our game. Also, execution.”

Jesus. We got it the first time.

If you’re repeating yourself, it means you don’t trust that what you said landed. And if you don’t trust it, neither will anyone else.

Say it once, say it clearly, and shut up.

10. If You Sound Bored, You’re Done

Ever sat through a speech where the speaker sounds like they’re reading their own obituary?

Zero energy. Zero emotion. Just words coming out of their mouth like they’d rather be anywhere else.

If you sound bored, how the hell do you expect anyone else to be engaged?

Passion is contagious. Confidence is contagious. Energy is contagious.

You don’t need to sound like a damn motivational speaker, but at least act like you care.

Bottom Line: Learn to Speak, or Get Ignored

You don’t have to be the best speaker in the world. But if you can’t communicate with clarity, confidence, and presence,then you’re just another voice in the noise.

Want people to listen? Want to lead? Then start acting like it.

Or keep talking like an unsure, rambling mess. Your choice.

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